For my darling brothers, Tulsi, Seochand and Sunny....(.whom I miss terribly)  and all the other brothers of my universe not forgetting my Gaia brother, J.    Actually, this blog is for you, J....for being so inspiring always....

How fortunate I am....
 

The Power of The Thread

Raksha Bandhan is a sacred tradition

It bonds brothers and sisters in devotion

Raksha, the Sanskrit term for protection

Bandhan signifies a tie or relation

Translated, the bond of protection, the thread of love

This is a tradition handed down from above

A long, long time ago from the golden Age

The Sky Gods are the ones who set the stage

Sri Krishna was once injured on his hand

Drupadi tore a strand from her sari and made a band

Krishna was there to save her from dishonor

as she was about to be disrobed by evil power

Indrani, the wife of the King of Gods, Indra

She empowered the thread with a sacred mantra

On the verge of defeat was Lord Indra's army

The physical ritual empowered minds for victory

On this day, Yama, the God of death visited his sister Yami

On his forehead she put a tilak, on his hand she tied a rakhi

By this display of love, the God of Death was touched

Anyone with a rakhi will forever be protected; he vouched

May Raksha Bandhan, the ties of siblinghood

Forever remind adversaries like Pururavas to be good

The power of this thread will continue to grow long

It may be weak but the bonding is very, very strong

PS:

What about sisters' day.   Everyday is sisters day....

((((edited)))

.......Have I met anyone offline from the Gaia online universe?  







Hmm.... Let's see, I have been here for approximately... holy cow!!!!!!  I have been here for over a year!!!!  Omg!!!!  How did this happen?  Did someone speed up time while I wasn't looking???? 

It's a conspiracy!!!!

Holy yikes!   I still feel so damn ‘new'...and the most awful part is I still act like the new kid on the block...

Now, quick, let's get back to the question before another year disappears....

Yes, I have actually met with three lovely Gaians and I am still reeling that it actually happened to me...you see nothing this daring ever happens to me...

Why? 

Huh!  As if you didn't know.

I love living la Vida loca under my snug rock.  I swear if I never get to go travel anywhere for the rest of my life, I would still be the happiest person ever...

Yikes.  There.  I have gone and revealed a major short-coming about myself...

However, sigh...I forgot to tell you that I am more curious than Pandora ever was...and this is the thing that motivates me to move my er feet...

Actually, my curious nature and my endless list of relatives are what keep me moving... I swear.   When God was giving out freebies, I must have swiped up all the relatives....lol... because how else would one explain that I seem to have enough to fill a small country???

Lol.

However, just so you know...I love all my relatives, each and every wacky one of them...they are inspiring and amusing and ... but...I already know their minds, I know why they breathe, I know why they think vegetables, why they dream in more colors than the rainbow...and Psst...I also know why God loves them more than he will ever love me.  Sob. 

Quick.   Back to the question before a decade flies away....

Oh yes.... the incredible thing is that I met three lovely Zaadsters...er...Gaians and in the same week...

Chris and Liza on a Sunday and Nicole on a Friday. (will link their names to their profiles later...)

Why did I bothered to meet up with them???

Curiosity.  I needed to find out whether people are any different from their virtual selves....

Oh well...that and the need to explore 'real-time' minds from other worlds...why?   Duh.... how else am I going to acquire a universal mind?        I know. I know, I could read other people minds through their books, the Internet but come on, how many people blog and how many books could I really read?  Plus...with blogs...really, how many people put their whole minds in there?  Lol...

Okay...back to the meet-up...it's not as if I haven't done this sorta thing before...why I've met up with company's clients over the years but in the business world, there is nothing thrilling about that...'cept for some clammy palms and butterflies having a field day in my stomach...Psst...that's a secret....

With the Gaia meet up, it wasn't heart-pounding excitement either but it was more like meeting up with school chums...

Liza...and she's lovely and charming and very easy to get along with...in fact, she reminds me of my girlfriends from back in the school day....is the first I met of the three....and wow...I just realized something....of all the 200,000.00 Gaians, Liza is the first person I have met in person, probably because she's the closest to me in distance.....

Liza drove over to my house, abandoned her car at my home, jumped into my car and we drove off all the way to Richmond Hill, Ontario to meet Amma.

This was the reason why we were meeting up...because Pandora loves to open up boxes; any box...just gave her a damn box....

Trust me...this was more exciting than that first box...

We were going to meet a universal goddess, see for myself if she was indeed er huggable...and forever seat all the questions hovering inside my head...

Hmm...well...it turns out she is an extraordinary human being but I knew that already but you know the mind, it has to see for itself... dumbo mind...

Anyway, what impressed me about Amma was the fact that she kept hugging people without taking a break.... and the hug she gave me and Liza made us feel like new born babies, safe and snug and warm and breathless.... yes.... she held us tight against her heart...her lovely, sweet heart...filled with incredible love for people from all walks of life, didn't care whether they were stinky or sweetly fragrant as me... ha ha...

It was going to be a long day...there were so many people there....

Oh yes...I forgot to mention Chris.  After Liza and I arrived, we ditched our shoes and took a tour of the ballroom, got our tokens, retrieved our shoes and went off to Starbucks to chat while we waited on our ‘hugging' turn. 

After we got stuffed with coffee and snaks, we waited with a circle of people for Amma's entrance.  Within minutes, she was there, dressed in a white sari...waving and smiling sweetly.... and then I remembered...

Omg!  Chris!   We totally forgot about him.

So we followed Amma into the ballroom...squeezed in was more like it.... found seats on the floor...and Psst...we were supposed to take off our shoes...but yikes...we both forgot.... so I slipped off mine and hid them under a chair...whew.... no one was any the wiser...thank Goddess.... and sat down to listen to chanting of ‘aums'.

And then I remembered!  Omg! Chris!   I looked up and there he was, talking to someone...so I walked over to him...beckoning for Liza to follow me but she was in a comfy position and I bet she didn't want to lose her seat....(psst...either that or she didn't want to bring attention to her shoes which she was still wearing...lol....)

"Umm.... are you..." I clear my throat.  "Chris." I say.

He looks at me.  "Amy!" He says.

He's a lovely soul and warm and friendly...

How did we recognize each other?   Well...he was wearing a straw hat on his backpack...and me...even though I neglected to let him know what we were wearing...etc...etc...I mean...come on...how many brown girls walk up to a man wearing a hat and say, "Hi, Chris!" ?

We chatted with Chris for a few seconds and then Liza and I left to snap photographs of ourselves all over Sheridan...and by the time we made it back into the ballroom, it was time for our divine hugging from Amma... we bade Chris goodbye and made our way home...

Oh wait...don't go yet...I have to tell you about meeting up with Nicole....

She's a wonderful soul and it turns out she's even more beautiful than her photograph with a lovely personality.   We met up at a fabulous restaurant on King Street in Toronto...and our conversation kept on flowing smoothly until it was time to leave.

So there...my curiosity has been  fulfilled.  For now.   And the thing is....all three people I met up with were no different than they are here virtually...........................so really, one could know a person accurately through their words....pictures..... virtual self.....and yet....it's still wonderful to meet up physically.....so........let's get together and feel alright........so come on baby, let's stir it up, our minds i.e. ........online and off.........

Meet Vanity....a sweet character inspired by my friend Liza.  after she mentioned that her name should be Vanity..........so thanks Leez......may this one become a volume in no time....(but yikes, gotta do major editing before I quit my day job ;(

Whew!  Gotta add zee Disclaimer tooo:   Yada, yada,  the following characters are purely fictional and do not reflect any real persons bla bla dead or alive....

Chapter 1 

Vanity was busily snapping a picture of her self-proclaimed goddess friend when this hovering hunk stepped boldly into her path.

"Hey Babe, you should be in front of the camera!"  His smile was laden with pure charm. 

Vanity gaped.  That was a universal truth.  She was born to be in front of the camera, not behind it, dammit!!

"Come with me." The hovering hunk said.  "My car is parked over there." He pointed at a red Ferrari. "I'll take a few shots of you on my hood."

Vanity blinked.    Oooh.  La. La.  The bliss of posing provocatively on the hood of a firebrand car!     She started to follow him and then remembered Miss Self-proclaimed was still standing in a freeze pose. Vanity was vain but  never inconsiderate.   

 "Wait." She called out to the hurrying hunk. "My friend!"

The hunk glanced over his shoulder, looking a little bit annoyed.   "Your friend looks like she will be quite happy to play in her own head for a little while."

Vanity almost giggled.  It was true. Miss Self-proclaimed loved getting lost inside her own head.  Oh well, Vanity sighed and followed the hunk.

She was in the middle of posing in various risqué forms, stiletto heels clicking all over the roof of the car, when out of the blue, a voice thundered at her. "What the hell is going on here?"

Vanity spun around in shock and stared at the most handsome man she had ever seen.  Actually, strike that, her frantic mind told her.  This wasn't a man...but a God and he was standing tall, powerful legs apart, hands resting on his hips. 

"Nothing-I'm-was-just-" She stuttered.

"I suggest you and your paparazzi crew move as far away from my car as possible."

Vanity looked around for the hunk but he was no longer taking photographs.  A quick search found her camera lying on the ground and the hunk fleeing as if a whole hell of deadly snakes were after him.

"Missy, did you hear a word I sad?"   

The man...er...primitive god's patience was obviously wearing thin.

"Huh?" Vanity gave him a blank look.

"I said get the hell off my car."

Vanity was taken aback. She was not used to this kind of treatment from the male species.  Normally she received admiration, respect and even awe but never brooding anger.

"I-I-" She paused to recollect her thoughts.  "I didn't know it was your car." She finished lamely.

"Oh, yeah?" He subjected her to a lengthy stare, the kind of gaze that told her she was the only specimen in the universe. His universe. "Whose car did you think it was?    God's?" One of his eyebrows rose to Mars.

What an insufferable- "Look, I'm sorry...it was a mistake so you don't have to act like a bear bit off your head."  Vanity snapped.  

She walked gingerly to the edge of the roof and slid over the windshield all the way down to the hood.

"What the hell are you doing?" The man roared.

Primitive bastard!!  "What do you think I'm doing?" Vanity scowled. Duh. She almost rolled her eyes. Men had no imagination.  She tucked a tuft of escaped tendrils behind one ear and jumped off the hood of the vehicle to land on the ground.

She regained her breath only to lose it immediately.

"Oh no, you don't."  He moved swiftly and before she knew it, he had her imprisoned against the car.

"Let me go, you rude, insufferable swine."  She struggled to free herself.

He tightened his hold on her.  "Not so fast." He rasped.

Vanity stared up at him.  Something had changed in his expression. Raw. Primitive.   

Fear forgotten, she felt swamped by another kind of emotion.  Even her body was reacting in a most outrageous manner.

"You're not going anywhere until you pay for the damages you deliberately made to my car."

"What? Are you out of your mind?" Vanity stared in dismay at the man. 

"Am I?" 

Vanity followed his gaze and gasped.     Oh God. Oh God. Stiletto marks were all over the hood.    "I don't have any money." Her eyes flew to his in panic.

His lips twitched. "Who said anything about payment in money?" His face moved closer to hers and she felt his breath fan her  lips.

And Vanity lost her breath...completely....

So what happens next???

Well...sparks continue to fly of course...but the impending kiss never hit the fan...because that was the opportune time Miss Self- Proclaimed chose to come rushing unto the scene.

However, as Vanity will find out later, the rogue never intended to kiss her at all.  He merely wanted to humiliate her.  Some nerves!  However, it backfires sweetly of course...because no one messes with Vanity.

          Miss Self-proclaimed surveyed the scene and found not only was Vanity's camera abandoned on the ground but there were spirals of stiletto heel scratches all over the Ferrari.  She assumed the worst.  "Vanity Mendoza!" She shrieked.  "How on earth did you managed to get yourself into another huge photo shoot problem??"

"Shh." Vanity hissed but the rogue had already grasped her name as well as her whole list of vanity sins.  Men of these sorts never let anything escaped them...

"Vanity." He test drives her name on his tongue. "Mmm." And then "Hmm....it figures."

While Vanity was scowling her head off, the Lord of the Universe shook hands with Miss Self-Proclaimed. "Hi. My name is Sinclair but please, call me Sin."  He smiled like a leopard that drank all the milk. "And yes, your friend is in huge trouble with me."

Miss Self-Proclaimed was all smiles...totally bowled over by the lethal charmer.  "Please to meet you.  I'm Tina er Athena."

Vanity screamed inside her head wishing her friend could have seen the Lord of the Universe in his true colours earlier. 

She sighed aloud.  It was about time she brought this whole nonsense to an end.  She faked a huge yawn.  "Goodness me, look at the time.  It was nice to meet you, Sin.  Some other time perhaps."

She grabbed the fawning Athena by an arm and was about to drag her along when Lord Sin intervened.

"Hang on!" He commanded.  "I need your contact information." He pulled out his blackberry from faded, overworn jeans.

Vanity found herself hypnotized by the muscles rippling beneath his tank top.   "I'm not in the habit of giving out my telephone number to total strangers." A flash of her eyes told him "So there."

"I happen to know your name." He stated in a matter of fact way.  "That and one click on the Internet is all I need to retrieve your entire history."  He smiled. "So what's it gonna be, Vanity?"

Vanity gulped and searched her mind frantically.  Other than My Space, no other site online had any information on her.  And besides, she had used a fake name there anyway.  Ha!

She hid a smile and reeled out a totally fake telephone number to him.  "That's my cell number," she finished." 

And besides, if he found out her true cell number somehow, she could always not answer her phone.  It came with Call Display.  In fact, she would change her number as soon as she got home.  That should teach him to snoop-

There was a loud gasp from Athena.  "Oh Vanity, that's not your number!"

Bummer!  Friends were supposed to help you get away from the devil not push you into his path.

"I see you want it the hard way." Sin smiled. He pulled out a card and hands it to Vanity.  Report to my office before the end of this week!   We shall work out an appropriate payment plan, hmm?" 

"I don't have a budget for any extra payment." Vanity had no option but to be honest.  Her cursed vainness had caused a huge whole in her bank account-

"And that's my damn problem?" He asks. "Let me guess, you used up your budget on too many photo shoots?"

"Whatever." Vanity gritted.  What was his problem?  Rich men like him came with built-in repairmen of the R2D2 Starwars variety.   So why was he after her to pay for the repairs of a few hardly noticeable scratches....????

"See ya, Hot Potato."  He winked.  "A few weekends as my housekeeper should settle your debt in full."  He pulled opened the door of his Ferrari, slink his tall frame behind the wheel and roared out of the parking lot.

Vanity glanced at his card and gasped aloud.

"What? What? Tell me!" Athena begged.

"He's some kind of a Secret Service Agent."

"Huh?" Athena scoffed.  "So how come he's driving a Ferrari?"

"Elementary, my dear Watson.  He's probably working undercover."

"What do secret service agents really do?" Athena bit her lips anxiously.

"Duh!  It's a club where men wear high-end designer sunglasses so they could see right through your er jeans.  And oh...they carry umm er sig sauer guns as well."

"Oh God! Oh God!"  Athena gasped.  "Do you think he saw through my boots to my socks?  They both have holes in them."

Athena was acting as if her er--  "Tina!" Vanity rolled her eyes. "The man wasn't even wearing sunglasses."  And that was a blessing because Vanity definitely did not want him to detect heat in any of her er secret zones.  Who knows what infrared technology or whatever kind of technology that was built into his absent sunglasses could detect.

Athena relaxed.  "Oh! Duh!  Right." 

Vanity tensed as a new thought hit her.  Oh God.  She had no choice but to go to Sin.  There was something on her record she definitely didn't want him to see.  Oh, she was innocent but she didn't want the past to be dredged up again.  And it had something to do with a sig sauer caliber pistol.

Little did our poor Vanity realized she was already under investigation.  By Lord Sin himself.  And he had known who she was when he found her sprawled all over his Ferrari.

Lol.


......more to come on our sweet Vanity and our Lord Sin?  Perhaps.  We shall see....

Seriously?   :-(     or Seriously :-)

Hmm...well.... um....truth is.....my first reaction is to run a few miles away......either that or slap the irritant into oblivion........ha ha.................However, after a deep calming breath takes over my runaway senses, I am left with this question...

Where on this planet could I run to that no negative people exist?        
  

Let's be realistic here..............  They are everywhere at every street corner, every junction of life...................... and Psst...they are me and you...so running from them is trying to run from ourselves...........  Come on, admit it...you know you wanna...you and me...we are full of it...so there...that's the whole truth and nothing but the truth...

Now how do I deal with my brimming negative side?

I add some music and dance the negative energy into perfect balance...truly...by the end of the song, I am all positive joy...

In fact, this is what I have been doing this entire past weekend...lol...not by myself...although that would have been great too ...but I had half of the full blown madness clan with me in Schenectady for a wedding dancing the weekend away....

Here is one of the songs that rocked my weekend away....

Now I say to you.....

Dekho dekho hai shaam badi deewani
Look at this night; it's brimming with madness

Dheere dheere ban jaaye na koi kahani
Stories are created on such nights

Dilbar hai dilkash hai dildaar nazaren hain
Everything is so beautiful, so charming

Aaj zameen par uthre kitne sitaren hain
So many stars have descended on earth

Aklo hosh nami danam
No one has any wits left

Hum hain dil hain aur jaanam
Just us, our hearts and our lovers

Bas deewangi deewangi deewangi hai
There's complete madness in the air

All hot girls put your hands up and say
Om Shanti Om

All cool boys c'mon make some noise and say
Om Shanti Om

I met with my future self today and she wants to kick my butt.  Do you wanna know why?    Do you really?  Well...hmm....my future self thinks she's better than me, that's what!!!  

She thinks I'm naive, a skulker, too undomesticated, a scaredy-cat of a non-existent being like bogey-the-man.   She wants me to accept more challenges as if going to the gym is not enough!!!    She thinks I spend far too much time on Gaia.  She wants me to get more sleep because she doesn't want to look like frankenstein in 20 years time...

The nerves!!!!   She wants me to make all the effort now so she could look good in the future...and if you ask me what I think, I think she wants me to be her slave...  The nerves!!!!

Some inspiration!!!  She's only motivating me so that she can benefit in the long run!!!  I swear!!!  OF all the godamn nerves!!!!

Oh heck....I better run to the gym.... I don't want someone to have a fat-bottom in the future, now do I???   That would be a tragedy!!!!

Damn.  Some future self sure knows how to inspire their current self....so that they get all the benefits in the end....  yikes.

Sigh.

 

Yikes!  Why do these questions always happen to me late at night????  Why, why, why?

               ((((((((((((((((((((((((( "Why not?"    )))))))))))))))))))))))))

Who said that?  Did someone ask a question?     Huh?    No?     Really?   

 Hmm... I must be losing it..........Actually, no, I am not!!...........I smell a rat!!!    !!!!     The devil is around here somewhere and if it's not him, then it's the bogeyman...trust me...these two follow me around all day like a nightstalker... and psst...they hate each other to a fury...they are always in conflict...they are like yesterday and today, night and midnight, devil and evil, insufferable and incorrigible...and the only way to keep them from pounding each other into the ground is to not be in the same room with them...

Sigh.  However, we both know they are not reality so let's move on to the question of the day...er night...

How to help people get along, resolve conflict between two people, bla, bla, yada yada ...okay...I understand the question.

However, I don't feel too qualified to answer it^,    Actually, scratch that. I lie. I am too lazy to go deep within myself...so let me ask an expert in the field....

Yep.  The Lord of Conflict Resolution himself.

Can you guess who that is?  No?  Hmm...his ego is going to take a severe bruising...but I doubt it...they tell me he is egoless...

                             

            ((((((((((((((( yeah, right!!!  ))))))))))))))))

"Shut up, Hades."  Dang, Atheist Bastard !!! God!!!! "

Sigh. Deep breath.   Okay...I'm talking about Krsna.   Legend has it he solved one of the biggest conflict there ever was...the kurushetra battle...ever heard of the Mahabaratha and the Gita...???

((((((((((( ha!  You mean Krsna resolved the conflict by instigating a full blown war.)))))))

"Shut up, Lucifer."  I swear I am going to kill this bastard Devil.  "Krsna never instigated the war...he...he...oh hell..."

Okay. Calm down.  Calm down.  Deep breath everyone. 

Tell you what, let's go ask Krsna himself before the Devil,  prosecutor-wannabe, chop him to bits without a jury and a judge...(psst...ladies and gentlemen of the Gaia round table, you are the jury...final opinion lies with you...okay...so speak not and forever hold thy peace...)

Btw, I'm not leading you ...er.... the jury on...but Krsna is my fave mythological god...he's a player, a lover of life, the all seeing one...he speaks paradox and contradiction and everything else in between.  

And that is why I refused to bring him to this courtroom and put him on the stand.   Instead, I am going to his abode on the riverbank to meet him...

 Krishna is sweet.  He could be tough too but he never yelled at me, not even once, unlike you know whom!  And you know what else?  Krsna calls me Devi as if I am the sweetest thing he ever created. 

    

      (((((((((((    Devi?  Kool.  Ha! That title is a variation of Devil.......))))))))

"SHUT UP, Lucifer!!!"  I scream in my mind.

Sigh.  Yet another deep breath.  Cripes.  Am I ever going to get to the bottom of the question with so many rude interruptions??? 

Sigh.  So far in my blogs,  I have met with Shiva, The Devil, Jehovah God, Hades, Satan, Lucifer, Harlequin etc...(Oh wait...scratch Harlequin........he will be coming to a blog near ya. Soon.) but I've not met with my favorite of favorites.             The most all-knowing God ever.  Krsna.           This Guy is boundless, even infinite amounts of universes cannot contain him....................he is you and me and everything you see and cannot see...(he is the sun, the moon, the skies, planets, stars, galaxies, universes, people, animals, birds, fish, rocks, alligators, yikes!,  trees, clothes, skin cells, dna, all matter, all antimatter, nothingness, thougths, poop, dust and heck, even this keyboard.)

Intrigued yet?

Too bad.  I like Krishna.  I like him first.  In fact, I like him before I even met him.   (And my dear Devil, listen up. Krsna is not only better than your God, he can kick your God's butt...he's got an extra pair of arms and he can grow to humungous size...legend has it he spanned the world in three strides...)

       ((((((Sorry Devi.  I'm my own God.  Remember?   Atheist Bastard God )))))))

Sarcasm. Sarcasm. Sarcasm.  Ego. Ego. Ego.  Ignore. Ignore. Ignore.

 Krsna is the god of war and the god of love.  Within him dwells Brahma the creator and Shiva, the Destroyer. .............

Everyone is his friend...He will be your charioteer if you so desire.  He will wash your feet with fragrant water and then spoon feed you.  And he will accept whatever you bring to him as a gift, even a handful of peanuts or er even rice.

Are you in awe yet?   Ah come on, Lucifer. admit it.  You know you wanna.

Krishna is very mischievous too.  He sees this whole world as a laughing matter.  A Leela.  And that means, Life is a play, god's play.  We are all acting on the stage of life. Krsna loves this universe.............  Every bit of it...this universe is his creation and as we all know, the creator and his creation is one and the same...............  To destroy one is to destroy the other.   I know this for a fact....................One time my computer crashed and I lost my entire manuscript.  And it destroyed me for a whole year.  Heck, I am still half a person.  Weird.  It's almost as if I had emptied my essence into my computer and I am lost without it.   Anyway, good thing I have a waterfall inside me...but sometimes this flow could be interrupted by writers blockage...However,  if I didn't have a certain understanding after I lost a whole book, I swear I'd be a walking around like a homeless bum in my own house....er...or that could have been my ego...yikes!!!    What if our art is our ego??? Yikes, then we are all the ego of God!!!!!

Ah. Here I am.  I am here.  I've arrived at Krsna's abode.    Mmm...this place is heavenly, sweet, lovely river scenery...large shady trees laden with sweet fruits and fragrant blossoms are everywhere along the bank.  

"Hello, Devi."  Krsna spots me.  "Good to see you."           He smiles.  Actually he's always smiling but his smile grew even brighter to see me.  And mmm, he thinks all women are goddess. I love him for that. 

God, I so want to touch his feet but you know what will happen if I do THAT? Yeah. Exactly.  Krishna will touch my feet right back.  (This is the way he is, there is no superiority about him and that's the exact reason why he's superior.)

  I looked at his feet with longing.  I sigh and glanced away only to be drawn back to his lotus feet.

"What's troubling you, Devi?"  Krsna asks gently.

How to tell him what he already knows? 

  How to tell him that I am deathly afraid of his self-proclaimed, self-appointed ambassadors on earth.  They would outcast me in no time.  I can see them thinking now.  "She's the devil's advocate...how dare she let God touch her feet?   She's just a mere woman!!!  Off with her head!!!"  Or er, something to that effect...   (And truly, I don't like offending people unnecessarily...it's not good for my karma....) 

"I'm okay." I say, looking sadly at his feet.  

He smiles, clasps his palm together in the key of the universe position and half-bows to me.  "Namaste, Devi."

I gape.  Omg, doesn't that word means, "I bow to you."?   Omg.  I am squealing inside with delight.  How clever. 

 "Namaste, Krishna." I beam broadly.    "I love you."  I think I am going to take a seat beside his sweet lotus feet as well...and listen to him talk.  He's full of stories, this one.

"And I love you too, my devi. " He says.  "Now.   How may I be of service to you?"

"Er...umm.... you know how you helped Arjuna resolved the conflict within himself so he could fight his enemies-umm...could you tell me more about that--"

((((((( Snicker.   Ha.  Go on, sweet Devi, you're doing a good job...))))))

Ow.  My ears hurt.  Yes, you guessed right.  The Devil is here too.

"Are you okay?" Krsna asks lovingly as I attempted to clear my ear.  It felt as if someone said a loud "cock-a-doodle-doo" inside it.

"Yes. I'm okay." I say.  "I just want to know the truth about the Mahabarata war.  Did you guys really have to go through with it, all that warring for just a Kingdom?  Couldn't you have let Arjuna have it his way?  What's wrong with being a coward?  Sure, Arjuna could have been shunned by society but what's so bad about that?  I mean, I'm outcast all the time, there are people who don't like my Devil but what the heck...I don't go around killing them."

               ((((( Thanks, my sweet Devi.)))))))

Aw...it's nothing...my Lucifer..but you do owe me a future favor.  So there.

I look Krsna in the eye.  Gosh, I could easily get lost in them.  Already I am seeing the universe in his drops of midnight eyes.

Krsna smiles.  "Ah, Devi.  I see you have been thinking.   To answer your questions, no, we didn't  have to start a war....the war was already there...we feasted on it....  Two, we were not warring for a kingdom...but pride and ego and diginity and surrendering to the forces of the universe....  Three, Arjuna wanted to fight the war, he only needed a last minute assurance that he was doing the right thing....and that was when he went deep within himself to do some soul searching... and to answer your last question, there is nothing wrong with taking the coward's path...and everything right with it...and vice versa..."

"Hmm..." I say.  "Are you sure there is nothing wrong with it?"

Krishna laughs out loud.  "Ah Devi.  You're sure you want to hear it all?  It might disturb your entire psyche for a long time to come."

"I don't mind." I say with delight.  The Pandora in me was fully aroused.

"If Arjuna had taken the coward way out, a lot of people would have been indebted to him...in modern words, they would have owed him big time.  It might not appear so but Arjuna was making a sacrifice here...on a subconscious level...he was climbing down to other people's level...."

                                            (((((( Gasp   )))))

"You see, Devi.   The Kurus owed Arjuna and the Pandus and the only way their souls knew how to repay their debts was to sacrifice their lives...however, their conscious mind was not aware of this conspiracy..."

Krsna paused to gather his thoughts.   "In this universe we collectively designed, the subconsciousness do not worry itself about whether an action is good or bad...it leaves that to the conscious mind to decipher...and the wise mind knows that every action has a positive and negative side."

"I understand." I say.  Even Lucifer is nodding at this point.   "The subconscious intelligence within us sees the whole of any action...it does not split it into good and bad."

"When we pull someone out of a hole, the subconscioness sees it as an effort, a sacrifice and immediately that person is indebted to his rescuer.. " Krsna says as if I hadn't spoken.  Oh wait, I didn't...it was all in my mind.... 

"It's like a bank giving you $500.00.  Suddenly all your troubles are fixed but you have to pay interest, don't you?  Nothing in this universe is free...even the water you drink, you have to earn it through efforts...or it would not come to you or you would not find it..."

I gasp... "Wow.  So Arjuna made a sacrifice, gave the others a chance to repay their debts...."  I mulled this one over.

"Yes."

"But...but...don't you think Arjuna has consequences to face for killing so many people anyway?  Why would he wanna do that?"

"Ah, sweet Devi," He says.  "What is wrong and what is right?   This world is a lie and it's also a truth.  It exists and yet it does not.  To be against war is to be at war."

See. I told you he speaks paradox and contradictions.

Krsna smiles.  Again.  "The enlightened mind welcomes consequences.   And the enlightened mind knows that by helping another person could also put that person into a debt he could never rise out of..."

Well.  Too bad.  I'll still go on offering a helping hand to pull the world out of the hole they got themselves into...er...I think...or hmm....I  could just holler from above and teach them how to make their own damn ropes....yikes... that way, they won't have a whole ton of interest to repay to me....

I sighed.  It made some sense to me but the Devil was shaking his head.  "Er," I say..."I need to know one more thing, about that "war" you instigated...er I mean the war you created to help Arjuna light up his ignorance...was it a symbolic war painted in literal light to educate the masses on how to wage war on their own terrorism...er...their inner demons?"

                     

                     ((((((  Good girl!!! ))))

"Shut up." I hissed to Lucifer to keep quiet.  "He has a discus...even though he's sweet, he could wipe your head off in the blink of an eye..."

Krsna smiles.  "Don't ever be afraid to tell me what's really on your mind."

 "Er...um...thanks...okay.... Umm...there's this guy..."   I couldn't bring myself to say it was the devil who put that thought in my head... "who says the Gita, your longest song was inserted into the Mahabaratha at a later date." (Oh God...that could have been me tampering with sacred documents in a past life...yikes...)

Krishna laughs.  "Sweet Devi, what's true and what's not true.  Everything you see and hear has happened.  All the stories you read in books are stories happening everywhere...In one universe, the kurushetra war happened.  In another, it's a fictional story...and yet another the war happened without the Gita explanation...and in yet another someone inserted it.  And guess what else, Sweet Devi....In one universe, it's you who is following the bogeyman around and in that same universe the devil is not so enamored of you."

                                ((((((((((  Gasp   )))))))

Even Lucifer is amazed at that last bit. Yikes. 

Everything exists.  And yet everything does not exist.  All are an illusion and all are real.

(((((Dang.  I knew he would say that.  This man would make the best lawyer in town.  He has an answer for everything!!!!))))

"He's not a man.  He's a god." I hissed to Lucifer beneath my breath.

              

              (((( I'm a God too, Baby but I don't see you fawning over me  )))))

Ha!   Jealousy is afoot in my blog....

"But, my lord," I protested.  "Couldn't you have worked some magic and fixed all the problems?  And what about our current problem, why oh why can't you wave your magic wand and fix it all?"

Please.  I need a straight answer. Please. I begged silently.

"Sweet Devi.  The universe is designed like a stair.  To get to the upper platform, one has to climb.   In the days of the kurushetra battle, people were at a certain level.   To talk them from battle would have been a huge leap from one era into another...the universal law of cause and effect does not allow this...we designed it so that everything would flow seamlessly....and even though it appears like chaos, know that this universe is in perfect balance...that it's perfection in disguise....However, that said...know that if an individual puts in enough effort...he could swim the entire lenght of the cosmic ocean in seemingly no time....time is an illusion...so it's possible to leap from one era into another through tremendous efforts...." He smiles.  "In the case of the Kuru war, people were putting in efforts toward the war, not away from it...."

Krsna pauses for that to sink into my numbskull mind...

   "Imagine the day you gave birth to your son, and how happy you were to grow with him.  Now picture this, me turning him into a fully grown man right before your eyes?  "

"Yikes." I say.  "I would feel cheated.   And i would think he had some kind of disease. It would be a tragedy..."   However, if all babies are turned into grown men and women overnight, that would be okay I suppose.

"Exactly. Hence, those warriors would have felt defeated had they not had an opportunity to fight.  You've to remember in those days, they lived for war.         And if it wasn't for war and conflict, we would not have progressed to such heights and in this particular direction."

           (((( Awe. Right.  The Internet resulted from such a situation.  )))))

Lucifer is a genius :(
 

"We live for the challenges...it's the reason why we created this illusion so we could pretend...it's all a play....and without the challenges we would grow bored being omnipotent beings who know it all..."  Krsna says.         "Everything has to go through stages.  Right now, some are stuck in limbo land, the new age stage, religious dance, conspiracy theory fever and some who think they have reached the peak of enlightenment."

I put a hand up in the air.  "Er...I have reached the peak...umm....I think so..."

                                     ((((((((((((   I'll take you there, Baby...))))))

                               

                       Shut up. Lucifer.

Krishna throws his head back to laugh.  He wipes his eyes and surveys my embarrassed aura.  "When you reached that stage, you will be on the literal peak itself, my Devi."    He points at the Himalayas Mountain.  "Now back to your questions, the kurushetra battle was bound to happen.  It was reaction to an action taken a long time ago.  If Arjuna had walked away, the war would have gone on in another universe.  The outcome of the war was already destined...already existing.   Everything already exists... yes, Devi, the future already exists.  We are only travelling towards it. "

                                    ((((((((((((  wow!  )))))))))))  Lucifer is amazed again.

"So you are saying there is no ‘free will'???"

"Free will exists just as determinism does.  Free will is used to decide which path to choose.  Think about a village.  All paths to your friends' houses already exist.  Your free will comes in handy to pick which friend house you will visit today.  In other universes, your counterparts are either choosing the same house or different ones.    You want to visit all of your friends, right?  That's why you take many births to experience it all.  You want to play every part in every film."

 "Yikes!" I say out loud.  "But I still need to answer this question on this thing...er... social networking called Gaia..."

"What's that?"  Krsna looks puzzled.

I gape.  Wow. He hasn't been keeping up with his very own creation...

"Er...it's a place where we communicate with each other...on the Internet."

"What's the Internet?" Krsna asks as if he has no clue. 

"It's an umm  a sort of a universal mind in pictures, words and sounds."

"What's the purpose of this universal mind?"

"Well, it should bring about unity and peace for one...where everyone is exchanging and sharing the contents of their minds so eventually we will all think similarly...universal beings yet unique.... you know how the biblical god confounded our tongue when we were trying to build a tower to reach the sky last time, well...er...we are building a virtual tower this time...so he can't reach us there...er...he can't stop us from reuniting ..."

                     loud, raucous laughter in my ear  ((((  The Tower of babble )))))

"Shut up!" I hissed.  "It's the tower of Babel"

"I see." Krsna says as if he's still thinking.

"Er...My Lord...when two parties are at conflict, two babies fighting and hurting each other badly, should I interfere?  Should I intervene and help them to get along?"             Yikes!  I don't have any techniques in this area!!!

"You will know at that time whether you should or should not...only you could decide that for yourself.  It's totally up to you.  You will know what's at stake. You will be able to sum up the entire situation and if it's your safety that matters, you will put that beforehand everything else...    You will know that it all depends what you're seeking for yourself when you give of yourself to others....if you need recognition as a peacemaker, you'll be in every battle...heck...you'll even instigate battles just to be in it..." 


Krishna smiles at this last part so I know he's teasing.  Yikes.  Is he??? 

"Some other time I will tell you why the Good Samaritan gets killed but if you go over all that I have told you today, you might see if for yourself..."  He looks me deep in the eye...and I nod.   He continues. 'In the Kuru battle, I did not push Arjuna into it, I merely give him knowledge so he could make up his own mind....in the end, it was his decision, all his...he didn't have to believe a word I said, even though I used masterful persuasion skills...it was still his decision in the end....:"

I bow to Krsna.  "Thanks so much.  Could I come back and see you some other time."   I need to mull a few things over, ponder it over with Hades.

"Sure, my Devi.  Come to me anytime...I am only a thought away."

I smile warmly, my heart feeling saddened to be apart from him.

"Hey Devi.  Remember, parting is what makes the reuniting sweeter."

"Mmm.  I shall remember that.  Thanks." 

"Hmm...what do you think, my Lucifer??   Come on, tell me...the floor is open..." I say to Lucifer as I began making my way home but Yikes, the devil is fast asleep, just when I need him to be fully awake!!!  


Well...er...hopefully he wakes up and help me edit  this mix-up story....

Yikes!          Am I the last person to answer this question?       Er…that’s okay, I’m the last of the dodo birds anyway… okay…now to the task before midnight strikes and turns me into a pumpkin overnight…

Hmm…what kind of physical space is important to me?  Physical? Why, oh why?   Sniff. Why, oh why?           I like living la Vida loca inside my mind.

Oh well…I will settle for a rock. Only thing with living under a rock is that the grass is always greener elsewhere.    Take Hades’ realm for instance…It beckons each waking hour and sleeping ones too… mmm…. it’s heavenly there…the darkness is totally healing and rejuvenating…and I like walking with Lucifer in the wee small hours to pick night flowers… So there.

Now on a serious note, I’ve always been in love with small, dark spaces. I remembered as a child, I used to play in the darkest corner under the stairs and also under the counter of my parents’ store.  

And my favorite place for hiding from terror was under the bed. There was this guy in my village who was darker than Hades and when my brothers misbehaved, my aunt would threaten to call this dark guy to devour them…and silly me…I’m the first to scoot under the bed.

As if being one is not silly enough, I have to act like a dodo too.   I remembered distinctly of a horrible picture in a book that scared the dickens out of me…It wasn’t of any carnage or anything like that…why it was a Chinese painting of red swirls and black patterns.  And in order to view it fully, I dragged the book under the bed…because that was the safest place to look at it…

Well, that was back in the day…now I am not so enamored of under the bed trysts…. but I do know that it’s a place of safety.

In fact, it saved my life. I think. It was the period I lived at my aunt’s in order to attend college. And it was an era where kick-down-the-door-robbers  were on the loose in that vicinity.

Anyway, there I was in my room, soft, golden light pervading my mind, me getting ready for the night…all comfy in my nightgown, brushing my hair to a 100 strokes. I think I made it up to 70 something strokes when there was the heavy thud of boots on the verandah. (I don’t know where everyone was at this point but I do know my cousin was on the balcony. Later on I found out my aunt was next door, my cousin’s wife was visiting her mother…and my younger cousins were at their parent’s store with their father)

I remembered pausing on the brushing of my hair because there was a weak but terrifying cry of “help, help!”.

And suddenly I was screaming, dashing out of my room towards the verandah…. “Are you okay?” I called out to my cousin. In a flash, I saw him lying in a pool of blood. Dead. Oh God. Instinct took over…he was already dead…and the murderers were going to get me too. I remembered charging back into my room, locking the door and crawling under the bed…heart pounding like heavy boots.

The heavy thuds proceeded throughout the house, banging and kicking and then I heard one of the bloody Thuds speak. “She’s in here. I heard her screaming.”              (And do you know what they do to 17-year-old-girls like me?          You really don’t want to know how terrified I was at that point.               Nope.      Prayers do not come at that moment. Your mind goes numb…you can’t think…you can’t breathe…you can’t even remember you have a mother and father and that they would die a gazillion, billion deaths if their darling daughter dies by the hands of ignorance.

Anyway, back to the story, the Thuds kicked at my door a few more times and gave up. They ran down the stairs, grabbed whatever they could and disappeared as quickly as they appeared…

The most amazing part of this story is that all the doors of the bedrooms, which were not locked but merely closed, were all hanging on their hinges except mine.

Did my cousin die? Nope?      The bullet they fired at him missed and he scaled the balcony and ran down the street to get help…all the while screaming at the top of his lungs.        (If string theory is correct, I’m sure he was lying in a pool of blood in another universe and yikes…I am history there too :(      @#@$%#&$%

However, in this universe…hmm…yep…perhaps I am spared so I could write poetry to attempt to enlighten Thuds who will never read them…”Help!”    (Yep, told you I was the last of the Dodo birds :(

The Cradle of Life

At nights I wonder why, why, why
Waiting for the dawn so dreary
I have the urge to shut the sky
When days are loud and weary

I need to find enclosed space
Hidden from all creatures
A sacred, solitary kind of place
Away from religious preachers

Where is my temple of dreams?
The one that lies within mammal
A womb of self-healing regimes
With an opening to the paranormal

O, AUM, first sound of the womb
Reverberating, vibrant, so full of chants
You once resonated the walls of my room
Please fill me once more with your haunts

A temple of dreams, a healing, dark room
The urge to re-enact this scene is rife
Bury me within for the tomb is the womb
I’ll be reborn with a fresh outlook on life

Plagiarized from my own book  ~Goddess Thoughts~The rest are mere details

I understand flowers are born and flowers will die...........I know some flowers will be trampled upon and some will never make it beyond seventeen..................... I also know some flowers will live life to its fullest.  .........I comprehend that this is a universe of flux..........that the death of one is the rebirth of others.          I believe all of this..........that creation could only be preserved to a point and then its subjected to death and decay. ...................(And death and decay is a good and bad thing...and a good thing is that it makes room for new growth......even providing nutrients for new life....)

However,  it's the premature decay of creation that I am choked up about.......  I like to create and I want to preserve and when something is ready for the decay bin, hey, I've no problems with that.......... However, I am very saddened when a flower is plucked before its time is yet....(And even though I understand the why's of it, it still makes me blue :( 

Yes, untimely deaths has shown me that in order not to witness and feel the pain of a trampled upon flower, one has to preserve all that is not ready to die...,,,,,,,,,and that also includes the ego, the mind, the spirits.......(let Pandora thrive, okay?:)  and so much more...and because I hate the pain associated with the loss of a beautiful unique flower, the preserver has taken birth within me. ......    (The creator and the destroyer dwell within me too...but should I use my destructive powers to benefit only me?    O Arjuna, I now understand your predicament!             Yikes, I'm heading for the detached bin...;(

While other flowers are free to cut me down, hurt me, trampled upon me, I refused to destroy anyone or anything...yes...even my own mind that still wants to wallow in delusion........and when its time for it to die, may the universal destroyer bludgeon it to death...and bring forth a new mind......yes, there is a universal destroyer...it's called Accident...and even though it could be born from humans' touch, it does not have to be..............(Yikes, I'm headed for the loony bin...:)

Okay, that said.. ....My wacky philosophical illusions and delusions and beliefs are what help me to deal with loss...And if there should be death of any minds through reading this, may it be a gentle decaying death.  May these words preserve sweet minds and may it create new ones...

Yes. I am definitely headed for the loony bin....

Pouring my heart out to bring peace to others is the thing that helps me too....

Dear Ash & Sonia,

I met the Prince of Timehri when he was just a few hours old. (God, I was so lucky)   In fact, I was one of the first people to welcome him to our world.  (Huh?  You mean to tell me you didn't know Timehri was once blessed with a Prince? Yikes!)

Anyway, where was I?  Oh yes, I was waiting patiently at the hospital for the Prince to arrive.  And yes, I was one of the first few to have met him a few hours after birth.   If I had my way, I would have been the first to greet him the minute he arrived on this planet but the hospitals were old fuds and are still old fuds.  They have no clue that they should always allow silly old aunts to skulk around delivery rooms.  Bloody old fuds, eh!!!

Anyway, all of us, (aunts, uncles plus mother and father of the prince), we sat on a hospital bed and waited and waited and waited.  And then evening dawned and we reluctantly made our way home only to return the very next day and the next.

Our first sentence each time we arrived was, "Is baby here?"  And to be honest, we didn't really mind waiting.  You see, we knew all along.  Our Prince would be worth the wait.

The day our Prince arrived, something different was in the air.  We just knew today was going to be special.  It was the 3^rd of August 1988.  The trees bore more flowers than usual, the world was full of smiles and oh yes, even the insipid grass appeared greener.  It was a perfect day!

When I arrived, I didn't have to ask my usual question.  I just knew our new prince had arrived.  And just one glimpse of him had butterflies fluttering all over my heart.  He was here!  And he was the most good-looking baby boy I had ever seen.    I fell in love with him right away.  In fact, I fell in love with him even before I met him.  I know.  I know.  I was like that little squirrel in the movie, Madagascar. "I like him first!  I like him even before I met him." 

The Prince became the star of our universe from that day onwards.  When the old king died on August 20^th, 1988, the little prince took the sharp edge off our painful reality. 

Then one day, when the prince was only seventeen years old, his soul whispered to him.  "In another universe, there's a mother who desperately needs you to fill her days with joy."   However, our prince knew we would never part with him so he hatched up a plan with his Soul.   When we weren't looking, when we were paying the least attention, he would find an escape route into that other universe that needed him so badly.   (Darn that other universe!  Oh heck, I shouldn't be selfish, at least we had the prince for 17 whole years, right?  Right!)

Anyway, to our utmost sadness, the plan was successful and now ...sigh...we are left without a prince but you know what?   He has two lovely sisters in that other universe.   And do you know what our Prince is saying to them right now?

He is telling them with a tear in each eye of the two most beautiful sisters he had to leave behind.  (Oh and a silly aunty too) And you know what else?   He is proud of  us for allowing him to leave so he can share his love with other sisters in other worlds.

Do you know the names of the sisters he's so proud of?  Yes, everyone knows them.  Their names are Sonia and Ashley and once upon a time they were the sweet sisters of Sunil, Prince of Timehri.

Poetry helps me too...may it help others as well....

Forever Sunil

It seems as if it was only yesterday
When I last spoke to you on the phone
"Sunil, what would you like to be one day"
And I heard the pleasure in your tone

"I want to own a bicycle repair shop
And I never want to see school ever again
But my mom doesn't want me to stop
And everyday it drives me insane"

Boys will be boys; I had to agree
I spoke with your mother that very same day
How to help you to be by letting Sunil be
We saw you growing into a fine young man, anyway

Forever seventeen, yes, this is how it seems
You come here dear nephew, age after age as if on cue
In one lifetime, you have already been here twice
Every generation this is the norm, you come in similar forms

For you are Timehri true and through
You are the Sun under skies of blue
A daredevil kind of angel without wings
With smiles to grease up rusty old things

Forever the bicycle repair adept
Flitting in and out of trees
Swimming out of your depths
Laughing with the breeze

You are the cars flying by on high
Yes, you somehow seemed to know
Your bicycle is your portal to the Sky
You are only here for the show

I close my eyes and I see you there
Sunil, laughing, Sunil, riding up and down
Yes, I see now that you will always be here
You have not really left this town

You never seem to make it beyond seventeen
It is as if you come to replay this particular scene
Do you know I die each time you go away too soon
Why can't you live here for many, many moons

What purpose would this really serve
Sunil, it is as if you want to be preserved
A boy with laughing eyes
Revealing blue, blue skies
Riding up and down on his bike of thrills
Forever seventeen, a destiny already fulfilled...

 My pattern of late is that of eating, sleeping and umm basking in the after-glow of the past ..............u see...living La Vida Loca in the present moment is a hard pattern to paint repeatedly...       

................My mind isn't gifted with this kind of...artistry...well...er...not exactly true...umm...with the right kind of brush, hmm...mmm....................I think I could paint the immediate presence all over the sky...but I think that might become an eventual eyesore...........too much of one thing..............................so my mind keeps the balance.........enticing me to squint into the past, some lip biting about the future...and basking in a handful of blissful presence...every now and then...........  Yep...that's the pattern of my life...

The past, the presence and the future...the past, the presence and the future...the past....hmm....love the past.....already my mind's dwelling on yesterday's question.  Either I get lost in the present one or or chew my lips off about the future question...so here goes...

BS: (((BS, btw is short for: - before script or bull scriptum))) so before I begin my BS: I've to tell you, I think this is the greatest question ever answered...trust my ego on this one...now shut up and read, read, read........

The story er the greatest, senseless story...begins with me feeling blissfully free. I am under my rock, btw, stretching and yawning and smiling like sunrise itself...God, I love awakening from a deep slumber...........

Sigh. I've never felt so free in my whole life. Funny thing is I'm not free...I am strait-jacket-strapped to a job because I've got mouths to feed, etc...etc... some freedom, eh?

After all, other than the Sun, who's really free in this universe?

........Earth?  Is she enslaved by Sun, held prisoner by his magnetic charms and constantly biting her lips off thinking she will die if she's ever deprived of his warmth?

((((((((((((Dependency!  Ah ha...))))))))) Hopeless addiction!

Anyway, I think Earth is free to leave whenever she wants to..........but Sunny has her under his hypnotic spell...((((((and before anyone gets upset with the Guy, just remember, he's not holding anyone prisoner...................and it's not the other way round either...................it's just that He has something I'm always drooling for...............so I flock around him like a vulture...and then I blame him for snagging me in with his mesmerizing warmth... ..............................................  Some nerves, eh?  ))))))

Okay. Where was I, before Sunny Boy hijacked my mind?  Oh yeah... Despite my lack of freedom, I feel free...in fact...I think I am freedom itself... .........

And this is what I want for the world...for everyone to become freedom itself...you know instead of being a prison house...(and that should also answer the question of yesterday...) 
           ***god, I am such a genius...trust my ego again...it knows the truth*** Lol....

However, that said...I know...I know...I can never give "freedom" to the world...they have to earn it for themselves....................................although I still wished I could earn it for everyone but I'm not Lady Jesus.      I'm powerless, helpless...Lover of the Sun, trying to shine warmly upon my fellow earthlings with pesky clouds constantly interfering...and oh...some of the bastards actually use sun-screen on me....as if I am er...yikes...toxic...

I know I should leave it up to each human to come out of their cubby holes in their own time to accept my warmth... ............................because I believe I should not impose my will or beliefs upon others...you see, I think this is what drives us all deeper into the web of mess..................................(and trust me, this is not a bad thing...the bad thing...pure mind torture... is the inability to comprehend why the rain falls on the Just and the Unjust and the effect is not the same on everyone...and how to make the rain work positively for us.................................) yes, when I try to control others, it only serve to drive me deeper into the maze of Maya..............to be trapped for all eternity...or until freedom is earned...by releasing the hold I have upon my fellow people...by setting each bird free...cripes, it should be my first commandment...

......"Thou shall not impose thy free will or beliefs upon thy fellow men!"  Actually it should replace......................."Ye shall have no other Gods but ME so keep on worshipping my ego to infinity and beyond and never, ever question why or you shall be knocked senseless by my hell fire and brimstones!!!!" 

What the...!  The bastard...and yes, Thou's a bastard until it's proven his parents were married...so Bastard Square until then........Bastard retangle too!!!

Conniving BIBLICAL 360 degrees BASTARD in all caps!!!                  Perhaps Thou didn't want me  to know that he was imposing his commandments upon me the whole @bsurd TIME. .........

OKAY...that ‘bit' off my chest, one must also see that I'm just as guilty of everything I accuse my sweet, caring, God of...yes............................. thou shall not impose your will or belief on others... and this is the thing...just by saying it...I am imposing my will and belief on others... .................SOME awful NERVES I have..........!!!

Okay. Okay, back to the story.  How to achieve freedom? Oh yes...how did I managed to feel free although I am still glued to the hips of the Sun?

I think I felt the most free right after I met with Shiva, God of Destruction...and Psst...God of the Kama Sutra as well...but don't tell him blabbermouth told you that...or he might just burned me down to the ground with his third eye.

So there I was...safe and snug under my rock...(frown). Where have I used that very same sentence before? Hmm........................can't remember.  Oh well..............you know...Alzheimer could step in at any age...or is it amnesia...perhaps the rock fell on my head?? Oh God!!!  I've amnesia..............

...............Anyway...yes...there I was...under my rock...when my third eye opened...and guess what I saw? God. I am still stunned. Anyway, in my inner vision, I saw Shiva...God of Dark...(don't gape at me, the Man er God has more names than stars in heaven) yep, I saw Him sitting on a rock...      ((((well, he better not be sitting on my rock!!!))))

.............Wait a minute? Am I going anywhere with this story? Or is the story going somewhere with me??...Yikes...I think the story is taking me everywhere...because why else am I suddenly remembering this:-    Shiva once burned to smithereens, er...to ashes, the God of Desire...(I'm rolling my eyes here)...Ladies and Gentlemen, that from a Kama Sutra lord!!!    (He must be a terrible lover....no patience!!!)

...................Anyway, be afraid for me...be very afraid...one mishap and I'm dust!!!  Okay, where was I? Yeah. After I had my first-third-eye vision, I squirmed out from under my rock. By the time I was done wriggling out, yes, I was hot and sweaty and  flustered...but holy, Moly, sweet glory!!!   GOD!!!   I felt free.   I was free!!!

..............I remembered frowning. Would I always feel this free? I glanced up...and what do I see? Yes. You probably know what I am seeing... my whole dang life, I've been buried la Vida loca under a mountain!!! And not just any mountain!!!

The Himalayas Mountain!  Wait a min--    Or is it Mount Kailash?

......Who cares...mountains are mountains... ................Anyway, guess who is sitting atop of it all???                 Yep. You guessed it.    Shiva himself.  Huh!!!   So off I went to see Shiva in a huff of mad freedom......................Needless to say, it was a long trek up!

...................I arrived at the peak to find him totally into another universe. You know!!! Like what the #HECK% is wrong with this universe?    I glare at his third eye with all my might but nothing happens. .........

Huh? How come?

And suddenly I am reminded of the story of the Northwind and The Sun. One should never use force in a certain situation if one needs someone to open up their shirt and expose his...er...soul to you..............(So I became Sun-ladylike...smiling sweetly, shining warmly and so sure Shiva would get all warm and ready to unwrap his soul for my viewing...) Ooops...I almost forgot to mention, I also ran off to pick some fresh, fragrant flowers for his sweet, lotus feet........(yes, at the peak  of mountains are flowers opening regularly)  I brought him some Tulsi too.... Tulsi's fragrance is heavenly.  Mmm...I want some now!!!

.....................Anyway, you think that would work, but abso-dang-lutely...still no show!!!!  (The guy...and what a guy...actually a Guy in Full...........................)         Anyway, the guy continued to ignore me, his mind fixed on some inner star...as if dancing to solitude afar...

..........................."Hey you." I say out loud. "Look at me...I'm more interesting than that universe you are obsessed over....." But he continued to ignore me...his peaceful face telling me, he knew, knew I was under his spell...or rather I was a non-existing rock for all he cared!!!

He was in a really deep trance. How to snap him out of it? And frankly, if the feminine sunrise within me couldn't awaken him...then will the real Slim Shady please stand up...please stand up.........

Okay...back to the story. So I waited and waited and waited and just when I made up my mind to leave, lo and heart bracingly slow, Shiva opened his eyes...yikes, all three of them and looks directly at me. ...............

God he's so handsome. His face is serene and peaceful.  I so want to go where he has been...and oh...never mind.............

He smiles at me as if he has never seen such a beautiful morsel in that other universe he was so obsessed with previously... ...........

............................"What can I do for you?" He asks me. (He asked the question as if he owes me a favor.)

I frown. Oh yes...he does owe me... (You see...I was supposed to be mad with him...but instead I choose not to blow up that path...like he did to poor Cupid...........

"I need you off my rock...er...off my mountain..." I begin with a stupid stutter...

 "Nope." He says calmly. "I was here first...you're the one who invaded my space."

I was at a loss for words...either that or something hijacked my tongue. What a bully!!!  I continued to stare in stupefaction. Some nerves-

"So where did you come from?"   He asks after I failed to come up with a hot retort.

I almost rolled my third eye. "I didn't come from anywhere...I've always been here...and you see, Sir...you've got to set me free...you're sitting on my rock..."

"Why should I do that?" He looks at me keenly as if he could hardly wait to receive my answer.

"...............um.......because I'm trapped...you've to...lift your weight off my chest...er...rock..."  I also mumbled an unladylike sentence under my breath..........................."please cart your sunny a&%s@#s   ....er...sunny side off my mountain..."

"Come closer." He beckons me. I slid closer to him and he leaned over to whisper in my ear. "I've only imprisoned you under your rock because you've imprisoned me."

"What?" I spluttered. "Have you gone mad? I've never, ever imprisoned another soul...not in my heart, not in my mind, not under my rock...not anywhere?"

"Oh yeah?" He smiles. "Open your heart and take a look."

So I did...and goodness, gracious me...I'm taken aback...good lord........so many I've imprisoned... and Psst...you know what sickens me the most?             I actually imprisoned Jesus as well...(poor guy...how many centuries now?)          and all because some Dufus told me I should open my heart and let Jesus in...poor guy...the minute he stepped into my heart...slam!  The door shut and locked....and he was imprisoned in my heart and forced to be my slave...like the poor genie enslaved by Aladdin's lamp!!!               Can you imagine, Jesus not even allowed a relaxing staycation because I'm always mewing for this and pouting for that?

"Set them free..." Shiva instructs me lovingly..."and you will also set yourself free."

So I not only set all the Gods free, I set my whole bloody family tree free...

"Oh wow!" I say to Shiva. "This has got to be the greatest commandment I have ever heard...I think I am gonna tell it to the world..."

And then my face fell...I knew instantly it would not make sense to the multitude because a "rock rat" like me has yet to earn my audience...which I probably lost by foolishly telling them that their emperor was a wolf in sheep...er...cheap ...............actually their emperor never had any new clothes on...

Shiva smiles as if he could read my thoughts.  "It depends who tells the tale.  Commandments from Rock Rats will be received like duck falling on water's front...it'll make no refreshing splash on the brain..."

I frowned. "Why is that? There has to be a reason why people lap up even the chewing gum from a Dalai Lama but will not hesitate to stone a rock rat like me for opening her blasphemous mouth...even though ...sob....even thought...it might be blasphenous wisdom..."

......Shiva crinkles his forehead in that way I love. Gosh...I can sit for days and admire the way his third eye goes up to the sky...way beyond mars.

"Yessss." He says slowly. "There is a reason but you know what...let's leave that tale for another day... you have already used up all the credit on your master card..."

Shiva held up a palm...like Neo in the Matrix...probably to stop my poison glares no doubt...

The nerves. Bummer. Bastard.  I thought he was my Sun...and that I could crawl out from under my rock to obtain information er bask in his warmth whenever I was ready!!!

He frowned as if he was reading my mind.  "The sun is always there...however, wear sun block and be glad clouds and earth block the glare as well...................too much sun could be detrimental for your health.................and don't be too greedy for information...it's like eating more food than your body needs.....................................if you can't absorb it all, it's water on duck's back...too much could even drown you..."

Bla, bla, bla!  Yada, yada, yada!!!  He sure knows how to preach...and preaching is what I don't need an iota of!!!

Yikes...the truth does set one free but if you don't know the whole truth, it will make one stomping mad.... and that could be dangerous...(too many have used their free will to destroy themselves and others because they thought they knew the truth...)
 

Shiva spoke again.  "Try not to snag-a-sun, become your own sun.  You're capable of being your own everything, your own cook, your own doctor, heck, you can even become your own Jesus..."

"Why would I want to become Jesus?  In case you haven't noticed, I'm a woman..."  Cripes! What do I do to convince him, unbutton my goddamned-

He stared at me in exasperation, his third eye suddenly active...almost like a volcano about to erupt.

So I shut up fast and applied my listening makeup...I really don't want to end up like Cupid.  Whew!  I almost made it into the history books.  Yikes.  I prefer herstory books...so there!!!

"I mean don't go running to "me"  for every teeny little problem...become your own God and fix all your own damn problems that you created in the first place..."

"Er...I never..." I say.

"Be like the Sun, be like me."   He commands.   "And everything will come to you...just like you came to me..."

"That's not true." I scoff.  "You've to make an effort to go to people before anyone will come to you..."

His smile makes me grit my teeth.  "The Sun never comes to anyone yet the Sun touches everyone...........all the time...never worries about receiving...but always giving the sweetness of his warm rays, he touches everything on earth..........and the further away he is from earth...the gentler his rays..."

"In other words, he's always in a boiling fury..." I ventured. "And to avoid the anger of his heat, one should always stay at a safe distance?"

No answer.

Yeah, I grumbled in my mind...............Become like the sun, shining idiotically forever...I grumbled some more.......... "If you ask me, that's the passport to detachment itself...what fun is that?"   Can you imagine?    I touch everyone but no one touches me?        I mean, what fun is that really?  Just one pattern all over the universe...everywhere you go...Suns everywhere!!!     

Shiva spoke again.  "Just go back under your rock and ponder everything I just said...and then come back to me if you still have questions."

I see what's going on here...he's saying that if I don't get it and I come back to him for further explanation, then I am the true idiot......

Ha!